Holly is Four Months Old Today!

And here are some things you should know about her:

1. She likes to be held pretty much all the time. Several months ago I said that Holly was a pretty chill baby, and in some ways she is. But she’s also pretty demanding. If she is awake, she’s usually not happy unless someone is holding her. And it’s not enough just to hold her. She wants to be bounced, sung to, amused, etc. She wants a song and dance routine. Sometimes she will tolerate being put in the swing or under her baby gym for ten, maybe fifteen minutes, but for the most part, I spend all of her waking hours holding her and tending to her. I make Emrick’s lunch with one hand; I’ve started loads of laundry with one hand; I’ve even gone to the bathroom with one hand (tmi?). When Marcus comes home, I get to do some of these chores with TWO hands, which practically feels like a vacation. But this is all made up for by the fact that most of the time, she’s a pretty decent sleeper.

2. She is ready with a smile. Despite the fact that it is difficult to catch her smile on camera (probably because I have to put her down to take a picture), the girl is a smiling sweetheart. She is just so, so sweet with all the smiles. And she gets more smiley by the day. When she has her occasional spell of not being a decent sleeper, it really puts me in a bad mood. On more than one occasion — when she has been restless and unwilling to settle for the night — I have approached her crib with a frown and a sigh, only to be greeted with the widest, happiest grin… and when she does that, my frustration dissipates and I remember how worth it this all is.

3. She is laughing! The laughing milestone comes after the smiling one, and Holly is doing it now, thanks mostly to Marcus. I’ve managed to coax a couple of half-chuckles out of her, but Marcus has gotten her into a full squealing guffaw on at least a couple of occasions now. And now that I remember it, I should mention that it was my mom — not I — who first got a real laugh out of Emrick. Hmm. Is it possible I am not as funny as I think I am?

4. The girl is a fire hose of spit-up. Well, maybe not a fire hose because that would imply projectile vomiting, which is a dangerous sign and that’s not what this is. But still, she spits up in copious amounts, sometimes even a couple of hours after she last ate. She seems to be healthy and gaining weight, though, so I guess I am not too worried about it. The main drawbacks are the resulting bottomless pit of laundry and a floor that is literally pointless to mop (or maybe I should be mopping all the time??). I am going to bring it up at her check-up on Thursday, though.

5. She won’t take a bottle. Sigh. So here’s the thing. I tried to breastfeed Emrick and it just didn’t work out. I could never get him properly latched, and the failed attempts at nursing just resulted in screams of agony. Emrick screamed sometimes too. I didn’t know at the time that having a rough start to breastfeeding is actually extremely common and that oftentimes sticking with it eventually leads to success. But even if I had known that, I am not sure it would have helped. Emrick was losing more weight in the hospital than he was “allowed” to (10% of birth weight max), and even after discharge he was becoming increasingly jaundiced. His bilirubin levels were rising. There was a lot of pressure to get him fed already. So five days after he was born (and after his third bili test showing high levels), I pumped a couple of ounces for him and fed it to him in a bottle. He ate it up and napped beautifully. I never looked back (OK, I occasionally did look back) and I pumped milk for him for five months until I got so burnt out on it that I switched him to formula.

ANYWAY, when I was pregnant with Holly, I planned to try to breastfeed again, but I promised myself that I wasn’t going to enslave myself to the breast pump again (I needed to pump 8-10 times a day to keep up with Emrick’s demand). If breastfeeding didn’t work out, I would either not pump at all, or I would pump for two months tops — just long enough for Holly to benefit from my antibodies until her first round of vaccinations — and then I would switch to formula. To my pleased surprise, however, breastfeeding has worked out pretty well with Holly. She latched right away in the hospital and fed with no trouble. We had a couple of rough patches over the next few weeks, which I understand now is totally normal, and now we seem to have hit our stride. I looooove the convenience of not being burdened with bottles (and not being burdened with my obsession with keeping everything bottle-related sterilized… seriously, if you so much as look at the silicone nipple wrong, I will boil it). I love that there is zero prep when it comes time to feed her (unless you count cozying up on the couch with a bed pillow, a burp cloth, and my phone as “prep”), and I love that she is benefitting from all the nutrition absorbed from my all-burrito diet.

BUT. She won’t take a bottle. And that kind of sucks. For a few weeks there, Marcus was taking on one of her night-time feedings a couple of nights a week (Friday and Saturday) so I could get a little extra sleep. So for a while there, she was in fact getting a bottle sometimes (I do an occasional pumping session and freeze the output just to have it on hand). But then around six weeks, we hit one of those rough spots in nursing, and I decided to lay off the bottles for a while, just in case they were contributing to the breastfeeding trouble. And then the rough patch passed, and she was sleeping longer at night, and I just didn’t feel like I needed the break that Marcus had been giving me anymore. I told myself that we would still give her a bottle sometimes, just to make sure that she would remain used to it for those occasions when I needed her to take one. But I guess I didn’t follow through with that because now she won’t take a bottle at all. We discovered this on December 17 when I had a late afternoon dentist appointment. Marcus came home early that day, while Holly was still napping, and I had a bottle all made up for him to feed her after she woke up. I planned to mail a Christmas package to my parents after that appointment. But while I was sitting in the dentist’s chair, I got a text from Marcus saying that Holly’s nap was done and she wasn’t taking the bottle. When I was finished at the dentist, I headed to my car and texted Marcus to see if maybe she had eventually given in and fed from the bottle. Nope. So I went home to feed her and then left again to mail that package. Since then, I’ve tried giving her a bottle myself on three occasions, I think. I got her to eat small amounts of it the first two times, but the third time was a bust. So, I don’t know what’s going to happen now. So much for those long days alone at the spa I had planned! (I wasn’t really planning a long day at the spa, but you know what I mean). I guess what I am saying is that having breastfeeding work out this time is a “mixed blessing.”

6. She is rolling over! She rolled over for the first time on December 9, when she was three months and three days old. This is at the very early end of normal. Emrick was an early roller, too but his rolling was different. He first rolled from his back to his belly, and it happened in his crib during the night. Holly’s rolling is the more typical belly to back kind (this is how most babies first roll) and she does it during tummy time. I was so surprised when she did it the first time, and since then, whenever she does it, I say, “Yay! Holly rolled over!” Emrick took note of this, I guess, because a couple of weeks ago I went into his room to get him up for the day. He was lying in bed on his belly, and when he saw me come in he rolled onto his back and said, “Yay! Emrick rolled over!” I remember my sister Samantha telling me that her older son did the same thing. When Nick was just starting to walk, his older brother Ed would try to get her attention by saying, “Look! I’m walking too!” So funny.

7. She has a widow’s peak. My mom has a widow’s peak, too. Is that where Holly got hers? Does Merlyn have a widow’s peak? I don’t know! I asked Marcus and he didn’t know either. Merlyn, do you have a widow’s peak?

8. She looks just like Buddy Holly.  Not actually, of course, but here’s the story… I’ve always called Emrick “Pookie” and Marcus picked up on that, but he also had a nickname of his own for Emrick: Buddy. And just as Marcus picked up on “Pookie”, I eventually picked up on “Buddy”, when Emrick was a little older. Well of when Holly was first born, I accidentally called her “Emrick” at least a couple of times a day, and because Emrick is also “Buddy”, I also called her “Buddy” by accident. And when I called her Buddy, I would immediately correct myself and say “Holly”, so the next thing you know, I’m accidentally calling this sweet baby “Buddy Holly” several times a week! So I now I sing her that famous Weezer song, but with the words changed up: “Oooheeooo, You look just like Baby Holly…”

Holly weighs 13 pounds, 14 ounces and measures just under 25 inches. She’s our sweet, smilin’ girl. We love you, sweet pea.